we are slowly killing the planet;

we are slowly killing the planet
note the use of 'the' rather than 'our'
because how can we call this world our own
when we are working so furiously to destroy it?

our constant drive for technological advances
is poisoning the world that has let us thrived.
as humans, we are sadistic creatures
maiming and killing animals for their flesh and fur
not for consumption to survive
but for supporting our never ending desires of 'fashion'.

predators of the world kill to live
humans kill for sport.

what really makes us any different from our animal counterparts?
they have families, just as we do
they eat and live, just as we do.

maybe we have the upper-hand in terms of intelligence
so why can we not manipulate that intelligence
to make this world a better place
and not only with words, but with actions.

and the irony of it all, especially with technology
is that we are not only destroying this planet
but our very own species.
so many new strains of diseases and cancers
are erupting with a vengeance.
we cannot hope to control science
when it is science that creates and controls
every aspects of our daily lives
including technology.
we only discovered how to manipulate it
we did not create it.

the survival of the fittest was not just a a fleeting idea of darwin
and nor was our scientist's theories of global warming.

we all learn as children
that trees and other greens
provide us with natural air cleansing agents
and our very link to molecular survival.
and yet, here we are
cutting down our forests, acre by acre
until there is nothing left
and still we will crave and want more
we will never be satisfied.

our species is just one in a million
we are no different from the rest
we are born, we live, we die.
we live among others who depend on the world just as much as we do.
who are we to take away the resources from them
who have just as much right to it as we do.

man versus nature
there are no sides
not when the world as we know it
is slowly decaying under our 'control'.

soul of hope;

and slowly the year begins to die
a solemn thought that lingers
ever present in the mind

but with december's death
a new beginning emerges
like a phoenix reborn
from the ashes that claimed it

this is the soul of hope
and we can all discover it.

she who became me;

and i kneel here
arms wrapped around the body
of a trembling little girl
a rain of tears wetting little cheeks

i can look into her eyes
and see the troubles that plague her
feel the emotions coursing through her
knowing every heartache and misery
experiences that no human being
should have ever been subject to

so much rolled up into one
a pandoras box
packaged prettily inside her soul
just waiting for release

i see the day her parents fought bitterly
when a trusted person touched her inappropriately
the realization of what death meant
and the shadowing thoughts of rejection

i hug the little girl more tightly
absorbing her into myself
every one of her memories
finding itself in my own
i vow to protect her
from the world's harshest reality
because it was she who became me.

already lost;

captured by his gaze
words caught in the throat
what to make of it
she doesn't really know

but it's tempting and reaching
circling all around
like wolves waiting for their meal

tantalizing and breathtaking
sirens on the sea
luring with sweet promises
he knows that he cannot keep

and still she draws nearer and closer
right into his waiting grasp

he will ensnare her
because she has already lost.

sitting by the window;

sitting by the window
fire crackling in the background
glass of cheap red wine in hand
wondering about times gone by

settled in a comfortable routine
boring but sensible
unexciting to the daredevil
safe play at its very best

quiet, quaint existence
personal haven in the bustling world
a place to call her own
no interference at all

sitting, staring, wondering
is there something she's missing?

eternity of peace;

strangers they have never met
but all connected just the same
united by unfortunate circumstances
from a selfish man's darkest desires

and while they suffered in their own silences
they found one another in their jointed heavens
and together they walked, forward into their own futures
for an eternity of peace.

holidays;

in the breath of winter's chill
comes the spicy aroma of cinnamon and nutmeg
with a hint of sugary sweetness

the overhead of clouds
grey with the promise of frozen rain
cascading down as artistic designs
to land gently upon rosy cheeks

the twinkling of the stars
mimicking the lights
on christmas trees
cluttered beneath the branches
brightly wrapped presents
waiting for the brilliant smiles
upon those who open them

and most of all
with the coming of the end of the year
there shines the beginning of new times to come
of dinners around the family table
where laughter and smiles are contagious
where people love and are loved

as is the beauty of the holidays.

lifted;

it's over now
and the heavy weight
that laid on my chest and heart
suffocating me slowly
has finally lifted.

caramel;

it doesn't matter how small they are
when their time comes
and they must leave us
the pain that comes along
it is just as great.

we do the best we can to ease their pains
to let them pass on through the veil
with as much comfort as possible.

and though we may cry
shedding many tears of sadness
we know deep down in our hearts
that they are free and without pain
they are frolicking in the vast green fields
and where food is plentiful and delicious
in their own private heaven.

and for us they will wait
just as we did for them in life.

goodbye, caramel.
i love you.

let's live it;

the shrieks and shouts
of childhood laughter
carry on outside like a musical symphony
that every person has once experienced
some, a year ago
others, fifty

the sound of joy
that now whispers
like a beloved memory
our minds may have forgotten
those carefree days
but our hearts will never forget

our very souls alight with happiness
whenever it hears those beautiful sounds
we must live fully, live happily, live positively
we only have this one chance
at this beautiful entity called life

let's live it
and never regret.

subway;

sitting on the subway
watching the scenery fly by
going seventy miles an hour
she'll be there in no time.

people watching to pass the time
the little toddler babbling happily
pointing at her colorful book
gesturing about things her mother only knows.

the elderly man at the front of the train car
flipping the pages of his worldly magazine
contemplative, with the hint of a smile
as he catches up on the latest news.

college students
one furiously flipping through note cards
no doubt, cramming for that impending test
another dozing off, head nodding, mouth slightly agape
leaning on the window, obviously foregoing the snooze button.

and then the train's horn, signaling another stop
automatic female voice dictating the destination.

it's her stop now.

private little word;

headphones on
foot tapping to the beat
coffee on the left
cardigan hanging on the seat
eyes scanning the pages
words blur, pictures play
dreams dance across the stage
in a private little world.

it was a rainy morning;

it was a rainy morning. and i was up with you early in the day, holding you close, your little body curled up against mine as i stroked the wills of death away. i had a test that afternoon, and i hated the though of leaving you, even for a minute. i knew in my heart when i wrapped you up in one of my old shirts, i would not see you alive that evening.

i kissed you goodbye, and left you at home, while i took the agonizingly long ride to school. i aced the exam, of course. and by midday, the clouds and raindrops all but disappeared from the sky, leaving behind a brilliant cerulean blue. all signs of the storm that raged the early morning hours were gone.

and then i knew, you must have finally said goodbye to our corporeal world. heaven opened its arms and welcomed you in. your pain and suffering were washed away with the rain. a rainbow painted the sky, and i knew, you were now at peace.

i said my final goodbyes, wishing you well in the afterlife.

life;

even when life ends
the world will still go on
time will continue without a break.

and the legacies we leave behind
one way or another
they will impact the world
some small, others on immense scale.

life is the most precious gift
live every moment to its fullest.

broken wings;

broken wings
like an angel
fallen from grace

the beating of the heart
the only evidence of life
cold and calculating
devoid of warmth and hope

but eventually
one has to stand
and move forward

even amidst the dark
there is always a sliver of light

she wanders;

sometimes she feels lost
like a wandering soul
uninhibited and seemingly free
but nothing more than a prisoner
of her own emptiness

the days the months the years
every second that flies on by
she remembers it all
and clings to them
the memories, her only hope
however it may mean that she lives
only in the past

step by step
night by night
day by day

it is ever continuing
there is no end

even when everything has long passed
time moves onward
oblivious to the trillions that come and go
happily turning on its proverbial axis
like the earth that which it guides

and will she still be wandering
a forgotten ghost among the living
searching for something she does not know
until she can wander no more?

obstacle;

it looms in the distance
like an ominous cloud of thunder
just waiting for the right moment
to unleash its fury.

but i know that i can overcome it
it's just another obstacle
on the road through life.

it's not something i cannot handle
just a little pebble
on my yellow-brick road.

hope;

dark, brooding, and mysterious
he builds a wall of steel to shield himself
black, obsidian eyes to the soul
calm like the first rise of dawn
on waters stilled as the dead.

love he has felt, very briefly in his life
his very existence not his own
but like a pawn on a chessboard
dispensable like the rest.

but then, she came along
ferocious like a lioness
the breathe of sunshine he never had.

she gave him the gift of hope
for now he has a reason to live.

life;

life is beautiful and precious
like a drop of sunshine
it's the very foundation of our existence

we should never hesitate to live

the air we breathe and the eyes through which we see
we can create our own legacies
because even in death
do we continue onward

truly alive;

i want to run through an open field
my arms held out wide
feeling the glorious rays of sunshine
and know that i am truly alive.

single moment;

the smiles and laughter which we cannot hear
but joy and happiness evident on the faces on each
captured in a single moment
many, many years ago.

while this one solitary moment in time is locked forever
in a precious piece of photographic paper
the world spins around us, faster
leaving behind everything we once knew
for only in our minds will they ever exist.

childhood faces of people we have ever known as adults
startling similarities that shine through.

it's amazing how we all grow up.

dark, empty road;

dark, empty road
on a warm summer evening
a breeze from full open windows
a symphony of crickets off in the distance.

drive down, down, down
the open road ahead
scattered lights around
perhaps they are stars
or fireflies?

a road that leads to many places
left and right turns
where is the destination
or is destiny many more miles up the road?

the end, the future;

it is over
the end came all too quickly
even though the journey lasted an eternity.

and now that we stand at the edge
we look out across the blank slate
there lies our future
clear and unblemished.

let's start writing our next chapters.

life and time;

it's amazing to see your childhood friends
and where they are in their lives right now.
the possibilities are endless
as are their realities.

the choices they have made
sometimes in the right
and sometimes in the wrong.
and comparisons are always made
it is inevitable.

what once was is now lost
innocence and carefree moments
all but a pool of memories
like the ones you once dreamed of.

life and time, two extraordinary aspects of the world
like the cool crisp breeze on an autumn evening
it is ever changing.
life moves on with time
and time can alter our lives.

expected changes;

you expected the changes
but what, you didn't know
the people, and the sights, and the sounds
they change slowly.

things aren't exactly static when you have left
the world will move on
just like you did yourself
in another place, in another life.

you walk through the old places
that you once knew long ago
no more familiarity, no more friendly hellos
it's all lost in the past.

you have your memories and the good times too
it's the once upon times you can look back
but in your heart, that secret box
that is where they will stay.

something to think about;

it's something to think about
maybe i'm lost in my head
watching the world through eyes
not belonging to me.
maybe it's just something to be
is it out of my hands?

truth that surrounds;

let us drive down the interstate
and find ourselves a new destination
a place we have never been before.

let us become tourists
in our own country
on opposite ends.

with a new viewpoint
we will gain a new perspective
where previously our minds were clouded.

let them open
and maybe we can see
the truth that surrounds us all.

we have forgotten everything;

we have forgotten everything
we don't know why we are here
anymore.

we have lost touch
to everything that once was dear
and the center of our worlds.

will we ever remember?
or is it forever gone
has it been swallowed whole
and how do we say goodbye?

dear god;

dear god
hello
how are you?

i am not sure what i am supposed to say
how am i supposed to talk to you?

do i revere you
or speak to you as a old friend?

help me find the words
that i need to say.

must i have organized religion
or can i just follow
my heart?

strange dreams;

strange dreams
which i recall so vividly
was it really only a dream
precognitive thinking perhaps
a vision into my future
or maybe only a whisper
of the many twists and turns
of alternate universes
that fate has to offer us.

to someone i had yet to meet;

to someone i had yet to meet
or at least, no conscious recollection
but we are family
and so still i stop and wonder.

i hope your passing from a painful world
was painless and comfortable
as you drifted off into permanent dreams.

so goodbye for now
we will miss you
until we all meet again
in the world beyond,

where are you;

where are you
where have you gone
you've found yourself lost
in the depths of forgotten dreams.

come out
come back
stop drowning in the past
we are all waiting for you
hurry on back
we are all praying for you.

ghosts of my past;

sometimes i can see them
the ghosts of my past
along the sidewalks of forgotten parks
or among the bushes
of secret castles and other wonders
only seen through the eyes of a child.

walking across deserted school grounds
memories reenacting themselves
taking shape in my mind
of the times that was once my present.

they are all but distant dreams
a once upon a time
and happily ever after
to that chapter of my life.

marriage;

something so unpredictable
people blindingly tying themselves
sometimes it works out for the best
for the lucky ones
and other times
it's a tumultuous ride from hell.

it is to be sanctioned
a holy joining of souls
but so quickly rushed
leaving what matters most
on the outskirts.

but people are never stationary
they are every moving
revolving on their wild axes
fluid like the blood running through
our arteries and veins
a life source that cannot be grounded
for very long.

marriage is overrated
the perfect love can only exist
in fairy tales.

where are you?

where are you?
you have a done a remarkable job of hiding
your face is not your own, not really.

why do you cover yourself up
in artificiality, via picturesque ink paintings
dotted with metallic clouds.

your tattoos may be a sign of your inner artist
but to allow it to transform even your barest emotions
are you really being you?

don't hide behind your superficial mask
they can't hide the light within your soul.

passport;

passport
waiting to fly
time to explore the world
many wonders to seek out there
set sail!

memory lane;

it is so hard sometimes
not to think of the past
and reflect on the years gone by
wishing to turn back the clock.

just a trip down memory lane
sparks and influx of sights, sounds, visions
a slideshow of the past
like a failing dam
with torrents of water rushing forward.

and while i feel old
isn't this only the beginning?
life has barely even started
and there is so much waiting for us.

living and wishing for the past
cannot help shape our future.

life cannot be lived backwards
experiences and memories
should only push us forward.

graduation and nclex;

we have finally made it
hello the brave new world
a long an tumultuous journey
but graduation is only the beginning.

in just a short few months
we will be taking the nclex
the scariest word to a nursing student's ears
which sends trembles through the body
but the ultimate test
it will prove our worthiness.

it is terrifying
but we will sure to triumph
and victory will be ours.

pretty little things;

pretty little things
we have no real desire for them
the marketing world does a fine job
of seducing our inner cores
the shopaholics deep within
just waiting to escape
like a little monster.

vampiric qualities it does possess
sucking the life out from our wallets
until it lies dry and barren
very much like our bank accounts.

but will we ever learn?
our desires to have
overpowering our better judgement?
then, what happens?

it's an addiction
with no cure.

here we go again;

here we go again
we meet once more
right at the beginning
where it all began.

this was where
the first steps to our relationship
began to take form
so unsteady on its two feet
like an unconcerned child
with no idea of repercussions.

the danger was never felt
we frolicked with one another
so unaware of what was to come
so lost in our ocean of love
we never knew when we began to drown.

but all good things must come to an end
or at least so they say
and it appears that we are fulfilling
the destiny has laid out before us.

beautiful day

beautiful day
you grace us once again
with your crystal blue skies
and splashes of white marshmallow clouds
here we revel in your sights.

handwriting;

handwriting
messy, scrawling
not quite chicken scratch
but not elegant either.
all different shapes and sizes
erratic and never stilling
resembling my sporadic mind.

hello;

hello
to another year being alive
two and almost a half decades
trying to leave my carbon mark
on this place called earth
where i call my home.
let's celebrate this milestone
call it a day late into the night
and hope for many more to come.

it's like an open window;

it's like an open window
your thoughts floating out
free like uncaged birds
uninhibited and able to go
where ever their hearts desire.

there are no boundaries
or obstacle courses to follow
there are no guides
no maps to lead the way.

just follow your intuition.

your mind may not yet know where
the end of the road
your destination lies
but your soul surely does
and it will take you there
in time.

way of life;

and that is the way of life
we are born
we are small
but we grow
older, stronger, more confident
into the adults we were always meant to become.

but strange things memories do
serving as a blueprint
of what once was.

of course
time is never linear
it is forever changing.
we are shaped by our experiences
nature versus nurture
oh how that stands true.

many faces i have seen in my own lifetime
some stay forever
others linger, and then slowly fade.
and it's bittersweet to see
how children become adults in their own right
sometimes fulfilling their potential
sometimes going down the wrong side of the tracks.

but that is the beauty of life
and what makes it so precious.

that we never know until it happens.

can't turn back the clock;

you can't turn back the clock
even for all those wasted years
separated and distant.
that is the way of life
unpredictable at its very best.

can amends be made?
can we start anew?
for the most part
no is the answer.
in certain circumstances, maybe
and with certain people, yes.
others are left just where they are
where they have been
since the beginning of the end.

always hiding behind the wall;

always hiding behind the wall
it's her backbone
her infrastructure
her protector
from everything in the world
it is her sanctuary.

large and small stones
her sacred wall in composed
and in each stone holds a key
a note, a memory, a wish
it is the mosaic patchwork of her soul.

and every time she needs to escape
from the reality that deems to much from time to time
to her stone wall she runs
it is her own version of a harry potter pensieve
where she can come and lay her thoughts and feelings to rest.

so that when she reemerges back into reality
she may do so with a clear conscious
a clean slate
with all the confidence she's ever had.

tiny little break;

mulling over a hot cup of coffee
a comfortable silence
amidst the busy world outside.

people talking
children laughing
cars honking
dogs barking
chaos at its very best
in the early hours of a weekday morning.

but a closing of the eyes
opens up the worlds within
where peace is a dominating force
calming the nerves, heightening the senses.

sometimes it's just that tiny little break
that everyone needs in their lives.

insignificantly small;

we are so insignificantly small
and yet, we believe to stand tall
higher than the mountains around us
reaching the skies
we think we can touch the moon
and move the stars.

but look around
the vast beauty around us
that we never take the time
to stop
to listen
and to see
not with our eyes, but with our heart.

we are caught up in our busy lives
a revolving door that never ceases to slow down
and let we let everything else pass us by
in a blur of color, sights, and sounds.

stop and breathe
the world is so much bigger
than we can ever hope to understand
it's majestic crown of beauty
that we can only ever hope to dream.

stop and breathe
before it's too late
and you forget what it is like to live.

who will i be today;

it's like dancing on either side of the court
two cards to play, depending on the situation
my ace and my jack, black jack perhaps.

which one will benefit me
which one will have me excel
it all just depends really
but i have the choice.

two halves of one
different from each other
and unfortunately
far more identified with only one.
the other has been left in the dust
like a long forgotten toy
abandoned in the farthest corner of the attic.

but still, the options are there
waiting for me to take my pick.

who will i be today?

restart life;

excuse me
where is the reset button?
i am in dire need of it
so it would be great
if you could just tell me now.

i've searched high and low
far and wide
and it is a futile search.

do you have the treasure map
where X marks the spot
and lies my beloved restart button.

please, i will barter with the devil
i will give him my soul
if only you will tell me
even a whisper.

seriously
let's have our do-overs
don't tell me
you haven't wished to restart life.

when did it happen;

when did it happen
when did it all begin?
we shed out childhood jubilance
our care-free days and mindless wanderings
of lazy summer evenings and afternoon naps.

when did we step out of our comfort zone
and enter the industrial lane
to become working zombies of society
where 40-hour work weeks become our future.

when did we become adults
making salaries, paying mortgages, and raising families
where did we find the strength
to stand our own two feet.

because i myself feel trapped
lost in a limbo of in-betweens
it seems almost impossible
to imagine the future described.

i will never be ready
and i almost don't want to be
but my strangling grasp on the past
is beginning to wane and become futile.

whether or not i want it
i will take my place in society
and i will have no choice but to continue moving forward.

it is times like these;

it is times like these, that i hate him more
a burning fire deep within
never quite extinguished
ready to flare up at any moment
if only given the opportunity.

it tears me apart
to see what life has done
and all i want to do is blame someone
so i blame him, my go-to scapegoat.
he did and gave nothing
the perfect escape.

i will never forget.
i will never forgive.

i want to run, far away;

i want to run, far away
off to a nowhere place
feet pounding
heart racing
and not stop until i have shed
every last fiber of my being.

i want to run, far away
and as i do
i take off the layers
one by one
my name
my past
my memories
i will let them fall
like raindrops on floating leaves
until they are absorbed into the ground.

and still i will run.

i will not stop
until my legs can no longer carry me
until i have sprinted to the edge of my sanity
where i will take a leap of faith
off my proverbial cliff
and fall not so gracefully
into the waiting waters below.

and then i will cleanse myself
until every last molecule that makes up my being
is doused and re-awaken.

it will be the time
to open my eyes
and revel in the new sunrise.

i saw those papers again;

i saw those papers again
and this time, i really took a look.
i guess technically
you were both at fault
both breaking the rules
fighting over one thing.

but still of course
animosity towards you
escalated
until my little heart wanted to pop
from increased pressure.

you are despicable
when i really think about it.
you would have tried far harder
had you truly cared.

spring;

beautiful, beautiful weather
clearest of clear skies
not a spot of white fluffiness
no marshmallow clouds to obscure
and the rustling of the trees
leaves dancing in the wind
whisper symphonies.

spring has come, spring has come
finally to grace us
after winter's cold, dark grasp
ice has melted
like a warming heart
chase the gloominess away.

the world is anew
bursting with life.

good morning, early morning;

good morning, early morning
before the crack of dawn
birds still sleeping
nestled in their nests
night creatures still stirring
scurrying around in sunday best
good morning, good morning
early morning
before the dawn
the sun still sleeps

but i am here to say hello

half-filled wine glass;

half-filled wine glass
discarded, abandoned
nothing but lost reminders
and empty promises

it's the same, over and over
paradoxical existence
a never ending circle.

hard to escape
and hard to see the light
but gotta try
gotta try.

renewed eyes;

dear world
just stop for a second
you're spinning too fast
i need to catch my breath
and take a look around.

my vision has been clouded
by dust particles spurned from the ground
the future shadowed and indecipherable
i've seen the light
i've seen the light.

it's like a heavy burden has been uplifted
like a drunk awoken from his alcoholic stupor
hangover dissipated and head clear
it's the dawning of a revelation
of epic proportions.

so just stop word, just stop
your axis can live with just one pause
so i can look upon you
with renewed eyes.

friendship;

brief moments in time spent laughing
over hot chocolate and caramel lattes
with friendships of old
that seems to never fade.

distance and years become prominent
we grow, we mature, we change
but there are some things ever constant
it's a beacon to which we cling
just to keep us grounded.

it is beautiful and cherished
the sunshine to our rainstorm
the bottle of love and happiness
this is friendship.

and so sleep evades;

and so sleep evades me once again
like peter pan desperately searching for his shadow
a never-ending game of hide-and-seek
it never wants to be found.

it's hard to count sheep who never stay put
or simply to shutdown the racing mind
impossible feats of self-heroic acts
slumber does not come easily.

somewhat of an insomniac
a sliver in the broad range
with erratic circadian rhythms
that too wish to call it quits.

eventually i will close my eyes
and sleep will come to grace me
but only to continue running a race in my dreams.

time;

time
is quite depressing, really
it never stops
it's a linear pathway
infinite.

i used to be able to count the years
that i have been alive
all on one hand
then two
and now i no longer have enough.

i see how old i will be
in the years in the future
and i am fearful of aging
i don't want to grow old
i want to stay young
forever.

getting older
means the ones i love
are aging as well.
and being organic organisms
we are not eternal
and we cannot live forever.
we must die and disappear from the earth
to make way for future generations
so that they may have a chance to live.

but i am still selfish
if there is an after life
i wish to remain here on earth
even as a ghost
so that i may be part of this world
despite no physical attachments.

but that sentiment too
is wishful thinking
and even if it were to be my destiny
it would be filled with sorrow
longing and resentment
of watching the young and healthy
the old and wise, alive
knowing that i can never truly be a part
when i am long dead.

skipping;

dreams and fantasy is where my mind lingers
oblivious to the calling of reality
i don't wish to go back
to that black hole, dark and cold.

it's cloud nine right here
no worries or troubles
an ease of mind
no dark thunder storms
to cloud my days.

i ignore the whistle of the train
the signal of the last boarding for the evening
there is no question of where it is heading
destination: reality.

i think it's okay to skip one more day.

chocolate;

chocolate
sweet delectable ambrosia
the chicken noodle soup to my soul
my private comfort.

you make everything better.

never deserved;

you were once cruel
your laughing jokes bordering on the line
and your relentless use of my body
it was just a relationship based on sex.

who do you think you were
toying with the mind of inexperience
was it just your idea of fun and games
no matter how much it hurt?

backstabbing with a flair for twisting the truth
you possess a scary mind and even scarier soul
i became afraid and desperate to hide
if only to avoid your gaze.

but it's been a long time now
since you last contacted me
to which of course i always ignored.

i see now how stupid i once was
to have given you time of day
when your mind and heart
you very being
was always elsewhere.

and now, i am grateful that it is
and i also thank you for what you did
because of your actions
you made me stronger
far more sure of what i definitely
do not wish to have in my life.

you were far beneath me
and never deserved to have me.

puzzle piece;

i haven't ever loved
where it pains me to see them go
where my heart rips from my chest
and is cut into a million pieces
as the romance dies.

none were very meaningful.
yes, there was happiness
and a fondness that captivates.
but only puppy love at its best.

something was always missing
a puzzle piece that was never there
leaving a gaping hole.
the picture that needed completion
never found the paint that bring it to life.

i want to find it
i know it is out there somewhere
i can almost touch it.

child that once was me;

i miss the exhilaration i once felt
so many, many years ago
as a child on a bike
riding over a wooden bridge
to get to the other side.

i can still hear the conversations
that children have among one another
and the memories they flood the brain
like a dam whose lever has broken.

such carefree days
days spent running amok in the sun
where adult troubles were nonexistent
and our only job was to grow.

those days have come and gone
all the children growing up and moving on.

how often do they revisit the past
their precious childhood
that society requires of us to do away with
as we face the world as adults.

i myself hold strong nostalgia to my past
because although they are now merely memories
their presence helps keep alive the child in me.

child that i once was
child that once was me
you are my inspiration.

we don't dance on strings;

what makes you think
you can play god
that you can toy
with the lives of others.

we don't dance on strings
and you cannot bend us to your will
for we have our own minds.

but you so selfishly believe it to be so
that you are superior
that the lives you destroyed
are meaningless.

think again
because karma's a merciless bitch
what you have done on others
will be done upon you.

circles;

walking around in circles
caught in a loop
it's never ending
and there is no edge.

where will it take us
this journey of continuation
what lies on the rim
what's on the other side?

puzzle pieces;

you've opened the box
and there lies the puzzle pieces
so many of them
jumbled against one another.

you dump them out on the kitchen table
a thousand little segments
maybe more
you can't remember.

laboriously
you put them together
crying in frustration
when some do not fit perfectly
but mismatched and
a recipe for disaster.

how long does it take you
sitting in that same little spot
by the same little window
the world is going on without you
and you sit here still
playing in your puzzle world.

something comes alive
as a picture is slowly painted
it looks so familiar
but you cannot remember.

you haven't remembered anything
in a very long time.

humming to yourself
you giggle softly
it's almost the end of the game
and you hold the last remaining piece
between your fingers.

and there it goes
right where it should be.
but you look at your hands again
wrinkled, age spots dotting the surface.

what has happened?
where had the time gone?

the picture you composed
comes alive
like a little movie
you see a life that you once forgotten
everything you once felt, you once seen
you once loved
flashes before you.

and then you realize
in this little kitchen
putting the puzzle pieces together
you spent half your life
living in the past.

driver's seat;

you think you walk a lonely road
down a dark, age worn path
but you don't know that the sun
the sun is shining brightly
so very high above.

you have lost hope
where did you leave it behind
check under the rocks
look behind the trees
it's there
it never left
it's following you
trailing, trailing.

there are no tricks here
only the sound of your sighs
alleviate the heaviness on your heart
let the light touch your soul.

you, you, you
only you're in charge
take control
you are in the driver's seat.

sunrise beginning;

it was something that i could
never imagine possible
and you have managed to crawl
right beneath my skin.

i feel like i'm losing grip
on this sailing wayward ship
to place where no one has found
it's uncharted territory
where i can finally sit and breathe.

it's a sunrise beginning
where the rays touch
the corners of our round earth
and maybe if we just kept on dreaming
it won't ever really end.

hello world;

hello world
you have seen so much history unfold
battles, kingdoms
and the evolution of mankind.

in the very beginning
we gave you your peace.
because according to science
we did not come into being
until many years after your birth.

you frolicked happily in your galaxy
dancing on your axis
blissfully basking in the sunlight.

and then things began to change.
microscopic creatures began to take form
as your body began to change
and life adapted.

the millions of years flew by
seconds in your eyes
until two leg walking humans
claimed your vast land as their own.

your rich earth has been drilled and torn apart
the landscape a battlefield of destruction
as humanity greedily sucked up your jewels.
like a man whose heart burns with lust
your body is his oasis.

how much longer of this can you take?
when will you finally snap
and redecorate yourself
overhauling humanity.
when will our end of the world
finally slap us in the face?

will you take mercy on us
and let us live, albeit perhaps
starting from scratch
and reconstruct our beginning.

or will you relentlessly destroy us
and let our entire history die.

winter wonderland;

hello, winter wonderland
you've coated your presence
with a heavy load of snow
along with thick ice on the roads.

your appearance brought joy to those here
but your lingering
is starting to wear the patience of motorists thin.
but for those like me
with no place to go
and not needed anywhere
it is a peaceful solace.

thank you for gracing us
we hope to see you again in the future.

find the hope inside;

who was it that told you
that you were worthless
and a waste of space
and a good brain.

what history do you bury under ground
that lead to such turn of events
that no person should ever endure?

who took your spirit
twisted it maliciously
squeezing until it could not breathe
and then step on it to make sure it was dead?

your days have darken
and you cannot remember the light
or how the sun feels shining on your face.
you have forgotten simple pleasures of life.

you have retreated deep inside you
a broken shell teetering on a tightrope
one wrong move and it is over.
and it seems like it is what you desire.

when did it all change for you
when you lost all hope
and even forgot who you were.

solace, help, and redemption
can be found in the most unexpected places
and when you do find it
let it consume you.
let it bloom inside you like a new flower
just rising to see daybreak.

find the hope inside you that was all but destroyed
save for a single, lone, flickering flame.
let it be your beacon
and rise out from your own depths of hell.

yellow-brick road;

what is it that you hide
behind those sad, sad eyes
where is the rhyme to your reason
what have you given up?

though you smile
to cover up the scars
it cannot reach your eyes
forced and without heart.

hiding isn't always the answer
running away will not erase the problems.
it may be painful
it may be hurtful
it may try to belittle and crush
your already cracking soul
but eventually you will turn around
and it will be there waiting for you

confront it and put it in the past.
running backwards will get you nowhere
you have to push through into the future.

your yellow-brick road waits for you.

are you lost;

are you lost?
so am i
let's take the high road together
and walk along the train tracks
it will lead us somewhere.

we'll hold hands and sing silly songs
point to the sky
and make pictures in our minds
using the clouds as our canvas.

we'll stop by an apple tree
go apple-picking
and run for our lives when we are caught
fighting for our lives.

and maybe, just maybe
we will find the end of the world
where our destiny waits with open arms
and sucks us into where our souls belong.