A fist of anger

A fist of anger
That stirs at the bottom of my stomach
Frowning upon the perpetrator
That dares to threaten a peace.
Almost contradictory
This threat seems to submit
To the element that means no harm
But simply looking for life's pleasures.
Put it into terms of you and I
And I simply do not understand
Why every sign I see
Is met with disapproval and scorn
When I will not befall the same mistakes
That you claim to have made many years prior.
Trust me when I say this:
That I will not let myself falter and fail
That I will rise above the pits of Hell
And find my own way, on my own terms.
Allow me this simple pleasure
Of which you have always pushed aside
That ended beautiful things
That might have been.
Two that have meant something to me
Two that did not have the slightest infliction
But another one that is hanging by a thread
About to tumble over the edge
Forever lost in the foam of the sea.
Why do you hinder me
Why do you wish to control me
When I need to live my life.
As much as I love you, I despise you;
It hurts me to do so, but it hurts me more
Especially when you jump to conclusions.
Secrets I have sometimes had to hide
Because of knowing your reactions;
And when I do come out into the light
You come back with subtle yet vicious vengeance.
Please forgive me
For I will go against your wishes
Because I already understand
That there will never be a time when you will accept my decision.

a life spiraling out of control

a life spiraling out of control
unable to get a firm grip
on the steering wheel of life.
deadpan electric whispers
that reverberates through my being
my soul captivated by this darkness.
hush, hush
a mother's soothing voice
that calms these nerves of mine
to better see the world.
no longer hyperventilating
heart rate coming back to a normal pace;
pumping steadily
slowly
as a peaceful calm settles over my thoughts.

Running, running

Running, running
Feel the adrenaline pumping
though the miles of veins and arteries
within me.
A heavy breathing
That lets me know that I am alive
Sprinting across the open field
and through the wildflowers.
The radiating sunshine
Coats the world in light
to bring forth a calm
With the wind tumbling the leaves about.
The debut of spring
marks the opening of a new season
filled with so much beauty,
an introduction to life.
Running, running
Through the fields and across the brook
Having no destination
But simply being free.

This sad revelation

This sad revelation
Of how quickly the world can change;
One minute, ecstatically engaged
And then the next, abrupt disconnection.
How did we get to this position
Where awkward conversations
begin to stir
And every thing takes a turn for the worst.
Mind blanked out
Absolutely confused
At this hectic state of mind
That offers no relief.